I know I told you guys that my next blog would be about court, but I have not got the verdict yet. Therefore I'm left in the dark and so are you. I should know something within the next two weeks and that will be the final part of the post for the month of July.
Moving on. I started a new chapter of my life. I had a birthday July 25Th and it was soo AWESOME! I wanted to do something spacial and new. I wanted to have a proper close to last year; which was entirely too stressful and caused me to increase the gray hairs on my head! I had to have something Wild, Crazy, and Fresh, so I booked a four night and five day getaway to Hedonism II . The saying is "What happens in Hedo stays in Hedo". If you don't know about this all Super-Inclusive resort you'll have to do your research. I will give you one clue. It's a Nudist Resort, that's right Au Naturel. I hope I didn't just loose some of you. Any how to protect peoples privacy except my own. I will be giving them surnames, and focus on my own experiences. With that said I will start from the beginning.
I'm a pre-planer. I've always been that way. I Don't like the stress and the rush of last minutes duties/task. I woke up on time, but my home girl ZsaZsa had been up all night. I don't know if it was the lack of sleep or just the excitement that we were in for an adventure; but the faster she moved the later it got. We left much later than we should have to catch our flight and there were literally road blocks along the way. Every highway we tried to jump on was blocked off. Our flight was at
6AM and we arrived at the airport a little after 5AM. We rushed into the airport and there were tons of people there. Little had we known there had been mechanical problems, as well as weather issues with flights from yesterday and today. We got in line to check in for our flight. Cutting off an elderly Hispanic man; which was not right, but we were desperate. Lucky for ZsaZsa she had two carry ons. We didn't get far from the check in counter when we realized the ticket man never gave us our boarding passes. When I asked the ticket clerk about them; he informed me that my flight had been delayed 4.5hours. He then told me I needed to get in another line because the delayed flight was going to cause us to miss our connecting flight; and thus was the beginning of our troubles.
We were in that other line for two hours. I had on a pair of espadrille heels and had finally decided to take a seat on my suitcase while waiting in line. My lazy butt should have remained standing, because when I got up I notice that my pretty, ankle length, yellow, dress was now wet in several places. Oh my goodness! What was on my dress? Was it something that had busted in my suitcase? Did my dress get into something wet on the floor? Could this be urine? I went to the bathroom to dry it after smelling it. It smelled of soap, thank God. In the bathroom I found only paper towels but that wasn't going to help me. I needed a hand dryer. I picked up the left side of my dress like it was a train and hoped the wet spots weren't visible. Although ZsaZsa let me know that you could see all three of them when I wasn't holding the dress in hand. The spots dried but you could still see them. Not good!
Back in the two hour line I kept hearing the same man talking and obnoxiously laughing out loud. I looked up and there was a short, sunburned, Caucasian men. I've never seen anybody look the way he did. I kid you not. This man had the face of an earth worm. ZsaZsa agreed and couldn't stop laughing. Waiting in line for two hours you start to notice everything. I'm a very detailed person, so now this was multiplied. As I stood there holding my dress; I noticed a Caucasian woman walking in my direction. She was heavy set with bright red hair. She had drawn on these ridiculous, large, red, eyebrows that were to big for her face. Then there was another Caucasian woman who had on short purple pants. Her entire body was round like a snow ball. She had the upper stomach as well as the lower stomach. The puff area is what I like to call it. I hate that part of the stomach it's like a pouch and its not cute. We women try everything not to get one,or to hide the fact that we have one. In this lady case hiding was not an option. She really looked like a cross between a snow globe and a purple grape.
Okay, so now ZsaZsa and I are becoming tired of waiting in the line; and we both decide to change out of our dress shoes into some comfortable non supportive flip flops. I have spent $20-$25 on flip flops trying to get comfort and support and I still come up short. We finally get to the ticket counter and find out that the flight that would have gotten us to our connection on time was just given to the family of four before us. You must know I was truly disappointed. I'm sure some of you are familiar with this phrase. "Timing is Everything". What should have been a seven hour trip turned into an 24hour trip. Our original trip route was to leave STL-TX-MBJ. I hope the abbreviations didn't confuse anybody. I don't know what made me do it, but before I gave the agent my suitcase; I decided to take a few personal items out and put them in my carry on.
Consequently we had to take a later flight which meant we had a later connection, and yet we still missed our connecting flights three times. I should let you know that none of these times was our fault! Two of them we missed because the plane was on the runway for 30 minutes after it landed waiting to connect to a gate. The other we missed because the ticket clerk couldn't stop complaining to all of her
co-workers; how she had hurt the same finger three different times that day. She wanted all their opinions if she should feel out an injury form. Well while waiting on one of our connecting flights I ran into a lady in the bathroom. She had a hair dryer in her hand. She had just spilled coffee on her white top. I kindly asked her if she was in a rush. She told me "No" and then I told her the story of my dress. I washed out the stains on my dress and she let me use the hair dryer to dry the spots. It was as if I had never set in the soapy smelly stuff!
So how did our trip go? STL-Chicago, Chicago-ATL, ATL-Miami, and Miami-MBJ. Did I mention we stayed the night at ATL airport? For several hours we watched an African American man ride that little security scooter back and forth. He reminded me of the movie Mall Cop, as he stared at us each time he passed. Anyhow ZsaZsa and I are trying our best to be positive and not get on each other nerves. The stress of traveling can be exhausted, especially when you realized you have missed one whole day of your vacation due to a traveling error that was out of your control.
Anyhow all was not at lost. I'm a true believer in "You should treat people the way you want to be treated", "It's all in how you talk to people". If you give a person respect 9x out of 10 they will do the same. Twice I was able to get ZsaZsa and I bumped up to first class. Trust me after seeing so many airports I needed a complementary glass of wine; along with having a nice cushioned seat with extra leg room. Did I mentioned the soft, warm, throw blankets and the headphones. Although I always have my Snuggie on hand when I travel. People always stare st me when I pull it out. Ironically some one always comes up to me and tells me they wish they had one. Yes this was one of the best gifts my grandmother ever got me. Oh yes. I can't forget the complimentary snacks. You don't get that in coach. You have to pay for everything except a juice or soda beverage.
There were many other bazaar people we saw while traveling to our destination. Starting off with the English lady who had the weird toes. Her big toe and her pinkie toe were much bigger than usual, and they turned inward. All the toes in between were small. Both feet looked like a human wrench. This was not a pretty site, but obviously the lady had learned to live with her disfigurement. She had on a pair of sandals that showed off her entire foot and her toe nails were polished. Then there was a men who looked to be in his late 60's. He was tall with grey hair. He kind of resembled Santa Claus, yet his backside was bigger than two of mine. Oddly enough there were a lot of people we saw with jacked up feet. I saw all type of weird shape toes. Not to mention the African man dressed in his African garment. He was sitting with his knees in the chair. His thick nasty flaky skin on the sole of his foot was facing us. His foot resembled alligator skin. I guess when the heat is on the hideous feet will come out to play.
Needless to say ZsaZsa and I enjoyed first class immensely.
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